The Icing and the Cake

I am a transformer. I help people transform their bodies, souls, and minds.

My experience has been in aesthetics, the icing, specializing in all things related to beauty. As a permanent cosmetics artist, I’ve worked on thousands of people, creating a more visually pleasing image of their features, concentrating on balance and symmetry.

My passion for beauty began at an early age when I became aware of how people positively changed when they viewed themselves as being more attractive and also how others treated them. It is the powerful “Halo” effect, and it’s real, and it got my attention at a very early age.

Changing a person’s appearance by assisting them in losing weight, getting a new style, and possibly various cosmetic procedures have been rewarding ventures. However, life-changing transformation occurs when a person becomes aware of their true identity.

My passion for TotalTransformationsNLP” now is taking beauty to the ultimate level, the level of self-actualization. Once a person realizes who they really are, they experience a level of confidence that creates joy. True beauty is far more than skin deep. Clearing limiting beliefs and negative emotions are foundational to become the best version of yourself.

There is a multitude of lifestyle coaches that have a specific niche or specialty, like financial, fitness, etc., specialty backgrounds. My background is aesthetics, personal image, and beauty. Believe it or not, Self Actualization and Beauty do not have to be oil and vinegar.

My business is “TotalTransformationsNLP,” which focuses on the whole person, the icing and the cake. I help you love yourself. ♥️

The Art of Victimhood

When I was 6 years old, I went on a 3,000-mile car trip with my mom, dad, sister Becky, and grandmother, Mamaw Audie Brown. Dad drove 95 to 100 miles per hour for countless hours on endless highways in his gigantic yacht-like Cadillac. No safety belts or cell phones in those days. Good times!

Mamaw Audie, whom I adored, would tell me and my sister ghost stories in the back seat. Mom was Audie’s only child and we always felt we belonged to her. She was a young and sassy grandmother to us, although she had experienced a harsh and cruel childhood herself.

When she was 6 years old, she was in an accident where she lost her leg from a gunshot wound. Shortly after the accident, her mother died while giving birth to her baby brother. She was poor, an orphan and handicapped, all by the age of six. All of this trauma somehow made her the best grandmother in the world.

I was always comfortable with Mamaw as she would take her leg on and off as needed. I grew up watching her navigate her prosthesis. From my perspective, having only one leg never stopped her from doing anything. She was confident, well-spoken, and strong. She fished, gardened, and, had she not been raised at the Louisiana Baptist Children’s Home, I’m sure would have danced. This is how I saw her. She was never a victim.

Meanwhile, on the trip, Dad would stop every few hours for us to use the restrooms and make us run and stretch. Then, he would buy enough sweets and junk food to induce a group diabetic coma, which was a mandatory tradition for all Fluitt road trips. When we finally reached New York City and got settled in our hotel room, it felt like a different world coming from Louisiana; skyscrapers in a concrete jungle.

Mamaw Audie had not traveled much in her life, so this was a new experience for her as well. We took off on foot to sightsee and stroll around near the Empire State Building. While walking down the street, Mamaw held me and my sisters’ hands tightly. Forty-five years old, wearing bright red lipstick and a belted dressed, Mamaw was beautiful and fierce. We had zero fear when she was near us.

To our surprise, we encountered our first openly homeless beggar. Mamaw was accosted by this man who was on crutches. He looked pitiful, unshaven, disheveled, and was wearing shorts that exposed his amputation. He said to her, “Lady, can you give me some money?” Mamaw ignored him and kept walking. I said “Mamaw, why don’t you help that poor man? Please give him some money. He only has one leg.” I guess I pushed her “Tilt” button with that statement. Mamaw turned back towards the homeless beggar and gave him a speech that I will never forget.

She nailed “Victimhood” clearly and schooled him for 10 minutes, hardly taking a breath, on how pathetic he was for utilizing his handicap as a parasite to society. Little did this beggar know that Mamaw had a prosthetic herself. She hiked up her dress high on the right side and thumped her wooden leg saying, “Losing a leg is no excuse. Get a job! You just approached the wrong sucker!” He replied, “Damn, Lady, I just asked for some money, not a speech.” Her famous last words to him, as we walked away were, “Don’t like my peaches, don’t shake my tree!”

I had never seen wrath come out of my beloved grandmother like this. It was an indelible memory that led to an awareness of the “Art of Victimhood,” which is kryptonite to man’s true divine purpose; a treasured learning.

Thanks, Mamaw!

Understanding NLP: Myths and Misconceptions

To many people, the term NLP ( NeuroLinguistic Programming) sounds a bit intimidating, esoteric, maybe even spooky. In reality, it is none of these.

NLP is a scientific concept based on the notion of understanding our behavioral models. Simply stated, an individual's behavioral models are a product of his or her experiences. Through our experiences, we develop a system and form values, beliefs, attitudes, memories, and emotions. These various attributes make up our personality and dwell in the subconscious mind.

Our subconscious mind is like a hard drive and contains the akashic data of every thought, word, and deed collected via our five senses since birth, or even before birth. Our conscious mind can't contain, handle, or operate this enormous amount of data.

Through a filtration system, we delete, distort, and generalize the mega chunks of data. The filters are created by the data of the subconscious mind, which skews the conscious mind; thus, molds our world view. This is the meaning of "Perception is Projection."

Our individual world view controls "How" we act, react, and interact with other people and the world and "How" we model behavior. All behavioral models involve processes which become a program, most of which are unconscious.

NLP techniques help to create an awareness of how to recognize "How" we connect the unconscious processes and programs to our conscious thought. This marriage between the conscious and subconscious directly affects our everything; beliefs, behaviors, feelings, and emotions, etc. Epigenetics is the conception of this marriage.

Sometimes, old programs need an update. Our filters are like cataracts over the lens of the conscious mind that create limiting beliefs, limiting decisions, and negative emotions. Learning "How" a person processes is the first step for radical change. Excellence can be modeled!

Creating clarity by adjusting the lens of my 'client’s' perceptions is my intention and mission as a Master NLP practitioner. It's time to Update. Reboot. Upgrade!

~Debra Rasberry